Ell von Apfelstein

Eliot von Apfelstein was a revolutionary leader until he joined the rebellion during The Great Connortatorship.

Early Life
Eliot was born in Jötunheimr. This means he is half human and half frost giant. He learned quickly how to deal with the cold weather by making hot soup to keep himself warm, although he yearned for something hotter. He decided to travel the world, learning new ways in which to make hot food. On his travels he encountered many people, including a spiritual being known as Jimi the Messiah. Jimi showed him the true path to beautiful long hair. Eliot still longed for something hotter, until one day he met a black man who taught him the true way of hot food. A way that made his arse burn. This black man was know as Kurian who showed him how to make curry. Kurian loosely translates to "curry man". Eliot became a student of Curry and learned more as he travelled with Kurian. Until one day when they were pulled over, while riding their horses, and Kurian was arrested by a white policeman who claimed Kurian was carrying a gun. Eliot went on his way, while Kurian was in jail, and showed the world how to make glorious curry.

Who is Eliot?
Our friend.

What is his political outlook?
Anarchist.

Notable Achievements

 * First man on the moon (with a beard)
 * Won England the world cup in 2014
 * Defeated Ellen in the Great Pizza Debate of 2013
 * Longest wank in the UK
 * Tallest dwarf in history
 * The current UK Nationwide Baked Bean Eating Champion
 * Bridged the gap between England and Germany
 * Burned the bridge between England and Germany
 * Escaped from the house of Marcelo
 * Longest person to be President of Iraq
 * Inspired Adolf Hitler (not only in appearance)
 * Killed a bear with its own bare hands